Double Trouble Dating.

Double Dating. Is it really a good idea? Ever? Anyone have a good story? Please feel free to share.

Anyway- my overall rating of the night was like 8.5 on a scale 1-10. . . but my friend would score it like a 2. Her date happened to big the biggest douchebag on the planet, and that's being nice.

I know I should have written this over the weekend, but I was hoping I might remember more of the details as the days went on. Obviously, I got drunk just like I planned. I treated it very casually, like it was just a bunch of friends going out together. Luckily, my date (who we will call Speedy) rocked. He was adorable, sweet, smart- you know all the things I want but are scared to death to accept? The one problem I had with him was the major one. He wasn't tall enough (And I don't want to hear it. I have ONE standard I will not budge on and it's height. I'm sorry. That's the way it is and if it means I will forever be alone then so be it. It can't be that hard to find an awesome guy that meets my height requirement- well, obviously it is, please refer to the long list of douchebag ex-boyfriends. But jeez- it's one simple request, people!)

So there we were, at Bowery Electric, a rock bar in the Village (When they say hole in the wall, they meant it. If you didn't know where you were going you would have missed this place. And why is it all New York bars look bigger and nicer on their websites? They should be sued for false advertising) and Speedy and I are laughing having fun, when I feel a hand on my leg. It's my friend. She looks at me, "Help me. Omg. All he has talked about is work, he hasn't asked me anything and he has been texting the whole time." Granted, this guy was like 45 minutes late for our agreed meeting time and he showed up in the suit I'm sure he wore to work- how inconsiderate can you be? I understand you work in finance and you take your job way to seriously but it's Friday night! Loosen up and have some fun! Strike one.

We decided it was time to make a change anyway, so we walked over to MacDougal and end up at Off the Wagon. If you ever decide you want to partake in the festivities there, don't. It's a Grade A college bar complete with the beer pong tables and sweaty crowds of under aged drunks- but they played good music. Which speaking of good music, Speedy and I went to get another round and when we came back, friend grabbed me. "He doesn't know who Gwen Stefani is." WHAT?! Who hasn't heard of Gwen Stefani? Half of a Strike for that one- he is a straight man, but come on. I decided to be a good friend and sent her to go get more drinks, go to the bathroom- something! anything!- to save her. I started talking to him about music and he said he doesn't listen to music. ever. He tunes out music. Like at the bar, he told me he was tuning it out and all he could hear was me. That's Strike Two, buddy. Who doesn't like some form of music?! Music is my life. Major Red flag!

Drunkenly, I kept turning to Speedy and saying "Ok. Here is the plan. Operation save Friend from Douchebag". He was very cute about keeping with the plan, but I would always forget what the plan was. He would lean in and whisper "I thought we were doing [whatever I stirred up as a good plan]" and I would remember but decide that wasn't good and come up with something else. I was trying really hard, Jillie, but at this point I had way too much to drink and wasn't thinking. And I kept getting side tracked and making out (but more on that later).

This is about the point in the night when Speedy and I went to smoke and I got yelled at by a very intoxicated girl for not knowing how to get to Jersey. I was giving him a hard time about living in Jersey City and how if we were to go on a date there I would need directions b/c all I know is you can get on the PATH. Apparently, she was just a little too attached to the damn state and started telling me exactly how to get there- there are boats, trains and buses apparently. Well, if Jersey is so damn great why are you partying in Manhattan?

When we got back inside, McDoucheBag apparently left my friend to go take a "phone call" and never came back. Strike Three! Not that she wanted him to come back (she literally spent the rest of the night ducking and ignoring his calls and texts) but who leaves a date for 20 minutes to take a phone call? Good riddance.

Speedy was a very good date. He walked me to the subway, where we made out like teenagers on the fence of the Basketball court (so tacky. but so much fun). It really sucks I had so much fun. We decided we needed to hang out again, sober and more like a real date and such. Wouldn't you know he called the next day and wanted to go out that night? (Don't you know about the 3 day rule?) I must have made a very large impression. . . or I just happen to have TWO very large impressions attached to my chest (joking. . .), no matter. He invited me to his Birthday Party for next weekend and we have plans for later this week.

Stay tuned.