Thursday, April 17, 2008

Questioning a witness.

Hi, my name is: classified

But you can call me: you majesty. your royal highness. .

Don't ever call me: an amazon (that's GLAMazon to you.), close-minded, psychotic or crazy (it's kind of like the N-word and the F-word. Only kindred spirits allowed)

My fav. color is: black and pink and brown

My high school was: a tragic endeavor that I wish not to repeat, unless I could go back as the most popular girl.

My hair is: in desperate need of a new cut and a dye job, but since I don't trust anyone in New York to cut it, I must wait a few weeks to go home and get it fixed.

My birthday is: a national holiday in my world.

My dream gift is: being bestowed with the knowledge of what I am supposed to do with the rest of my life. But an Apartment in Central Park South would work too.

When I look down I see: fishnets :-)
(Yes we have a rocking horse in our cube that wears a cowboy hat. I have been known to remove his tail and throw it at people)

If I were a character on Family Guy: I would be the commercials. I don't waste my time or energy on this.

By my fourth drink I am: drunk and ready to make out with the closest poor unsuspecting soul in my reach.

I have a hard time understanding: how New York does not have a Chick-Fil-A or a Sonic.

If you spent the night at my house: you would get woken up by the obnoxious Puerto Ricans who perch outside my window, the car alarms and the Salsa music.

The one person who can drive me nuts is: ex boyfriends and my bestest Best Friend Ever.

Most recent thing I’ve bought myself: Kat Von D inspired sunglasses

Most recent thing someone else bought me: a drink?

In the morning I: have a habit of hitting snooze too often, crying a little that I survived through the night and checking my crackberry for the weather

If I was an animal I’d be a: fish.

What’s your top friends name: A Sexy Man, that's all you need to know.

Do you get along with this person all the time: all of the time? Are you kidding me? We drive each other nuts. It's the most fucked up odd couple situation ever. But I love him :-)

How old is the person: 26 (but don't tell him I told you- he'd kill me)

Has this person ever cooked for you: ha!

Have you ever kissed this person: yes. many many times.

Are you really close to this person: he is the reason I wake up in the morning.

Could you live with this person: Been there, done that. Yes. It was the best living situation ever. I (tried to) cook. He cleaned- up after me all the time. I talked through all his annoying Tivo'd reality TV shows, he made me smoke too much. We'd go out and only have to go to one residence. We'd pass out in the driveway eating Taco Bell. I'd crawl up in bed with him. He'd kick me off the bed. I'd get drunk and beat him up with a pillow while he slept (and there is an extremely good reason for that, btw). . . It was great.

How long have you known this person: The summer before my Senior Year of High School. We were camp counselors together. He tried to pawn sweeping the gym onto me. I told him I didn't know how. He despised me and I fell in love.

Have you ever had a sleepover with this person: all the time.

If you ever moved away would you miss this person: I already did :-(. We've both moved away many times within our friendship but we will always be soulmates (and he's coming to visit soon- I will be locking him in the closet, so we won't be far away for long. don't tell him, though!)

Do you know everything about this person: Enough to blackmail when he wins the lottery.

Have you ever made something with this person: we make mischief.

Ever been in love: twice.

Believe in love at first sight: I sure think so.

What is your bed size: Queen

Do you prefer writing in pen or pencil: pencil.

What’s your favorite season: spring, but apparently New York didn't get the memo that it IS spring right now.

Favorite radio station: n/a

Coke or Pepsi: Diet Coke

Favorite subject in school: English

Last book you read: I have been inhaling Chick Lit for the past month. I just finished Can you keep a secret? and I am now reading Material Girl. And I cannot get enough of Marian Keyes. Hey! At least it isn't historical romance! THAT gets me into way too much trouble.

Do you prefer cats or dogs: dogs. Cats are the devil

What’s your dream job: Lobbyist for Phillip Morris or Trophy Wife.

What kind of car do you drive: The A-Train.

Are you a better talker or better listener: Both but if the subject is me, you're S.O.L.

What do you miss most about childhood: thinking boys have cooties.

How many times did it take you to pass your drivers test: once

How many kids do you want: 3 boys and a girl

Can you cook: if it involves the microwave

Have you been to Disney World: I LIVED in Disneyworld.

How many TRUE best friends do you have: one not including my sister

Would you rather smile over a lie or cry over the truth: Cry over the truth. Unless you know for a fact that Lucas and Peyton will not end up together on OTH- then you better lie to me.

Who’s the last person you got into a argument with: probably my best friend about becoming a flight attendant.

If you could move away, no questions asked, where would you move: London

How much do looks matter to you in a guy: Not so much, but enough. I've dated the Greek-God looking and the not so hot ones. I'd like in the middle please. Cute enough for me to feel good about myself but not ugly enough for me to feel like I'm doing him a favor.

Whats the best feeling in the world: Having an Orgasm. Hands down.

Are you close with your mom and dad: definitely but not close enough to answer the previous question honestly to their faces.

Do you tell your parents everything: enough.

What’s your favorite color to wear: black.

Who was the last person in your bedroom: me

What’s something that someone can do that really bothers you: tell me smoking is bad for me while I'm on my morning smoke break. (THAT has death wish written all over it, btw)

What are you freakishly obsessed with: atm? because I get freakishly obsessed with some thing new every 3 months or so. the current craze: my black flats, researching New York State laws on lunch breaks, libraries and parks.

What piercings do you want: I've always wanted the Vampire Kiss on my neck, but that just doesn't seem so reasonable after I hit the age of 22. I have all the ones I want anyway.

Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass or fail: pass with flying colors.

Do you think that someone is thinking about you right now: a lot of people are thinking about me right now. I'm just THAT amazing.

Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in: before and get soaked in the process. Our shower head is a tragic hot mess.

Have you ever brushed your teeth in the shower: No but it s good possibility I will be doing it soon, if it saves me a few more minutes in bed.

Your favorite sport to watch: Hockey. Although, I have not done this yet, I think I will enjoy it.

Ever had stitches: many times.

Have you ever given money to a homeless person: this past weekend

Ever run over an animal: I don't believe so

Would you kiss someone of same sex for $100: yes.

More of a coffee or alcohol drinker: Coffee. Getting drunk and staying that way is too hard in the city.

Ever thrown shoes on a telephone wire: Isn't that code for a drug dealer being close by?

Do you snore: yes. It is tragic and one of the many reasons I hate for anyone to sleep with me. Heaven help me when I get married.

What are you afraid of: stupid people


The Ambiguous Blob said...

ahahahhhhhaaaa haha
You're my new favorite blogger.
But don't tell the other ones!

Eastcoastdweller said...

It takes more work than some people might think to fill out one of those questionnaires.

But -- at least when filled out by interesting people -- they are fun to read. In case You wondered, You are a very interesting person. In a good way, in a good way.

I never knew the thing about the shoes. Hmm. Imagine some poor junkie shaking on the street corner under the dangling shoes, waiting all night long, tragically unaware that the cops picked up the dealer he wanted to meet, six weeks ago.

And WHAT kind of fool tells someone enjoying Her smoke break that it's bad for Her? I would suggest that You take a nice, deep drag and blow it fully and calmly into his rude face -- but then again, that wouldn't be fair to those of us who would actually enjoy such a gesture and don't have access to it.

Eastcoastdweller said...

BTW, don't fear stupid people. Pity them. Mock them secretly. And use Your better brain to outmanuever them.

.Nicotine.Queen. said...

Tabbie- It will be our little secret! (Thanks!)

ECD (That's your new nickname, btw)- I don't know what the shoe thing means, and I googled it and apparently no one else on the planet really knows either.

and one day I'm going to get around to bitching about non-smokers with a thorough word beating, but until then I will just burn them,

.Nicotine.Queen. said...

Tabbie- It will be our little secret! (Thanks!)

ECD (That's your new nickname, btw)- I don't know what the shoe thing means, and I googled it and apparently no one else on the planet really knows either.

and one day I'm going to get around to bitching about non-smokers with a thorough word beating, but until then I will just burn them,

Eastcoastdweller said...

Burning is an acceptable option. Smoke, especially smoke that has been craved, savored and loved inside a beautiful person, is too precious to waste upon idiots.

Andie said...


you should know what I mean.