breaking news!

I think my left calf is bigger than my right.
seriously.
My boot keeps falling down on my left leg but it stays positioned on my right.

And if I drop dead soon, it is because the poisonous red dye that has been staining my hands from my silly putty has seeped into my blood stream.

Oh!-
Anyone know the asshat's name who suggested day light savings time?
My foot would like to schedule a meeting with his head.