Friday, February 27, 2009

Word of the Day: impetuous.

The Right Brain vs Left Brain test ... do you see the dancer turning clockwise or anti-clockwise?
If clockwise, then you use more of the right side of the brain and vice versa. Most of us would see the dancer turning anti-clockwise though you can try to focus and change the direction; see if you can do it.

I am:
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
risk taking

uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
AND I can also make her change direction.
I just used the creative side of my brain for a really cute idea I'm super excited about
and I hope it works out. . .

Thursday, February 26, 2009

My favorite co-workers

Did I mention I have been teaching some of my co-workers how to crochet at lunch? Yes, we are dorks and we know it.

Anyway, they just gave me this really sweet card thanking me. There is even a piece of yarn taped in there.
So sweet!
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They all asked for you.

First and Foremost, I would like to apologize for the previous post. I was not that drunk (or at least, I was not that drunk at the time of posting). Apparently, the spell checker on my Blackberry does not recognize "Mardi Gras", "Bacchus" or "peeeeeee" as correctly spelled words(and rightfully so, they aren't English) and I was so busy worrying about floats and getting hit in the head with beads that I just let the spell checker go and pushed send.
I promise.
It wasn't until after the parade was over that I was drunk enough to slur my words and climb on top of streetcar statutes in Lafayette Square (I would post a picture, but what had happen was, I was in a skirt and it's not appropriate unless I was Britney or Lindsay but for the record, I WAS wearing panties). Luckily, I was with two of my favorite people in the world, who shoved a Rally's hamburger and fries (YUM!) at me and put me to bed.

And because of over doing it Sunday night, Monday night's Orpheus Ball I was more concerned with staying hydrated and not flashing people with the very deep slit I had in my dress than drinking myself under the table. Drunken fun ensued- not to ridiculous proportions but I still didn't make it to Mardi Gras Day :( There was traditional Popeye's fried chicken from the comfort of my parent's couch in my pajamas watching the festivities from the TV. I was thoroughly made fun of for turning into a Yankee, but it's not my fault! I cant afford to drink like that here!

It was a fabulous 5 days. I got to spend time with my family and friends. I bypassed having to go to Bourbon. I got princess parking for the Bacchus parade. I had a near-death experience driving home from the Ball and came out unscathed (some douche crossed 3 lanes of traffic and nearly hit us. Drunk driving kills, people). I ate a lot. I give Carnival Season 2 drunken thumbs up!

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Ain't no place to peeve

In case you ever come to New Orleans for Mart Grad, I'm going to give you a drunk locals P.O.V.: a place to pee is golden. We weight where we are going to stand by who has the best bathroom. I'm on St. Charles Ave. between Graver and Common because a friend is staying in a hotel there. Happy Mart Grad, bitches!!!

BTW, that was Val Killer's float in The crew of Batches :)
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Friday, February 20, 2009

Get set.

So. . . I packed my deodorant. My (oddly enough) only bottle of deodorant and now I have anxiety about smelling bad because it is packed, which I'm sure is causing me to sweat and actually smell, thus not having imaginary anxiety but a reason to be slightly concerned.

And I just realized I forgot to pack pajamas.

That's what I get when all I want to do is crochet. I feel like a crackhead but I look like a pothead in my new slouchy hat- that I finished at my desk at work feeling like a crazy person (must. finish. hat.).

Hope everyone has a fabulous Carnival Season! I did not pack my laptop, so I might be MIA for awhile.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The finished product

I'm sorry, but I'm ridiculously proud of my head band ear warmer.
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Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Packing can be so interesting?

I was just about to do a post on packing because I'm going home this weekend for Mardi Gras, but you know what?

no one cares.

seriously?! Who gives a shit, but me! Some of the stuff I subject y'all to is crazy and I'm going to try and be more selective- with my posts and my packing :-)

Monday, February 16, 2009

Better than Overheard.

F My Life

fabulous, I tell you.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Lights, Camera, Fashion Week!

Guess who is going to a real Fashion Week fashion show?!

Guess who is super excited to see Jordi Scott?!

Guess who has nothing to wear?!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

There is too much to do today

Work is just getting in the way. I need to finish learning how to make flowers (not to mention all my other crochet projects. Note to self: quit telling people you will make them stuff), I need to find a ball gown (and an outfit for a fashion show) and I need to go shopping.
There are just not enough hours in the day! Especially now that the weather is so nice today, New Yorkers have come out of the woodwork and are flooding the sidewalks.
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Tuesday, February 10, 2009

V-Day is coming.

I don't really want to be a Debbie Downer, but I do want to address this marketing ploy day that is coming up. I think the key to remember here is, it's just another day. Just like Christmas is December 25- It's just a day. No one is forcing you to acknowledge this, just like no one forces you to celebrate baby Jesus' birthday. Sure, there is more red and pink crap floating around but if you don't obsess about it, it will just fade back into the universe.

I've never understood why people put so much emphasis on it and I'm a little annoyed at hearing about how depressing it is. In fact, it really kind of pisses me off. Can't you show how much you care about someone throughout the year? Do you really need a day to remind you that you actually like the person sleeping next to you? If so, then you are way beyond my expertise help and I would kindly suggest breaking up pronto.

And if you're on the other side of the fence, I'm sorry that this day is a big slap in the face but shame on you for not being comfortable enough with yourself to get over it. Maybe you need to take a step back, embrace yourself for who you are without someone and maybe try again next year.

So, instead of wallowing in the fact you don't have someone to buy you a box of chocolate (which you probably don't need and who eats an entire box anyway?), go buy your own damn chocolate and let's focus on other important days that have the letter V in them. Like V-E Day or V-J Day. I think those were pretty important dates, more important than say this one where a diapered man baby flies around shooting people.

Still upset? Go here and talk to some other lonely hearts.

ps: this has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that surprisingly I have a boyfriend this year. I've never put much importance on this day and I'm pretty sure he will back me up on that. Yes, he will be in town but mainly because I will be out of town for awhile and we wanted to see each other beforehand. Wanna know what we are doing? I am going to leave him in bed so I can go yarn shopping then I'm going to make him do laundry with me. please try and contain yourself from all the romance dripping off that one.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Best Dating Advice Ever.

I don't know much about this faux famous Julia Allison, nor do I want to, but in her interview with, she hits the nail right on the head.

Q8:You've written dating columns -- what's one tried-and-true piece
of dating advice you can pass on to a man?
Confidence, confidence, confidence. If you have it, you don't have to have anything else. If you don't, nothing else matters.Make yourself a challenge, use intermittent reinforcement, always, always, always pay, and never ask her out using an interrogative: "Wednesday, 8 p.m." No question -- just a period. It's unbelievably sexy. Women look for reassurance that you're in control, that you can handle things. Be "that guy," the guy her girl friends wish their boyfriends were more like, the one who's always planning exciting new adventures -- plays, trapeze, a surprise trip to an island or a day roadtripping in a rented van -- not just another restaurant and a choice between the fish or the meat, the white or the red. Be the guy who's up for anything. Be the guy who makes it happen. Be more aggressive in bed than you think you should -- I guarantee she wants it rough, she just doesn't want you to think "she's a slut." Play hard to get for a time, but as things progress, throw in some mush and a little bit of security, too. Make her earn it, but when she does? Give her compliments, DON'T make her ask for them. And when you finally realize you maybe sorta might kinda love her? Tell her. Out loud. When she can hear you. Then tell her when her friends can hear you. Of course, you know you really love her when you tell her when YOUR friends can hear you.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Dear 1-Train

If I had to commute everyday through you, I would kill myself.

Dear A-Train,

You are still slow as fuck and I will continue to bitch at you especially during rush hour and late at night, but you are still my train. Our love/ hate relationship will forever own the bottom of my heart.
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5 things are better than 25.

I popped over to LaiLani and asked her to ask me 5 questions after I read hers- and they are good questions! It took me a good day to really think of the answer to them. Thanks, girlie.
(I would be more than happy to do the same for you- just ask me!)

1. If you were to go back- to way way backland and do Skool all over again, what would you concentrate the most on? Same stuff or different?
That's tricky. The sensible part of me would say "Yes. I would go back and concentrate more on school", but that's a load of crap. I would have partied more. I would have been more irresponsible. I got all my stupid irresponsible partying done in high school, so once I got to college it was all "Been there; done that; Got my stomach pumped". But thinking back, I would have become besties with a whole frat and partied with them every night. I feel like my friends definitely partied more than I did and I missed out on a lot between school, extracurricular and having a boyfriend- and if I didn't have a boyfriend, I was obsessing over him. It was quite exhausting.

The real question is if I would have dedicated as much blood sweat and tears to my sorority- the real reason I went to college (ok. so I'm lying. I really went to college to find my husband and no, I would not concentrate on him nearly as much if I knew then what I know now) and if I would have dedicated those 4 years making Regina George look like Mother Teresa. Probably not, but I couldn't do anything to change it anyway- I was bound and determined and I wouldn't suggest getting in my way when I'm like that.

2. What was your driving force to get outta dodge and into NYC, rather than trying to make it work in NOLA?
What other reason do people have for coming to New York? Power, Money and Prestige- all of which I have failed miserably at.

There wasn't anything to work at in New Orleans. The only thing that was keeping me there was my family and friends. I decided against law school, I hated my job (surprise surprise) and I wanted to make a jump. I felt like I was living in Groundhog's Day and I needed a change. I moved away for college for a reason- I didn't want to end up like the majority of the city, stuck. After Katrina happened, I became really big on staying in the city and rebuilding, but then that became too much to handle. Everyone was leaving and things became really depressing. This was also around my 25th Birthday which sent me into a huge Quarterlife Crisis, where I was questioning everything about my life.

I started asking my friends what they saw me doing and most of the answers were fashion related (I'm pretty sure they meant design, not the business side of it) and then the wheels started turning. Where else are you going to live if you want to work in fashion? And I figured it would be a good excuse to get me here- I had always wanted to move here; I wanted to go to NYU but decided to stay closer to home. If I hated it, there would be a lot more opportunities here to explore than in a city still broken.

Now I'm back to square one.

3. Do you ever doubt yourself? Like when you want something, but don't think you can get/achieve it?

I am forever doubting myself! Why do you think I'm stuck in the crappy office job instead of blogging from bed every day because my crappy book became a bestseller and is going to be made into a crappy movie (j/k. MY book will not be crappy. Someone else's is and I'm a little bitter)? I radiate much more confidence than I actually possess. It's all smoke and mirrors, trust me.

On that note, It's a little known fact that once I put my mind to something, I'm in it to win it and I usually do. It's just actually deciding on something that's the problem- and those vampires in your head are pretty serious. But most of the things I put my mind to are trivial. On things that matter, it's a little harder.

So, yes. I doubt myself often, but I keep it to myself.

4. Who has been the most positive influence in your life?
I'd say I'm really lucky. I have a lot of positive influences in my life. Can I say my therapist? Is that allowed? haha!
My top 3 (because there is no way I could pick one) would be my dad (he is the best dad ever. He is always in my corner and even when he drives me nuts, I know it's only because he loves me so much he can't help it) my niece (who would have thought a 6 year old could teach you so much about life?) and Cassi (having someone who blows your mind at how amazing she is think the same of you? It's crazy!).

Hands down, my best friend has been the most positive influence in my life. I strongly believe he is/ was my soulmate. He knows me better than anyone in the world and still thinks/ thought I was the sun that he revolved around. He never used that information to use against me or for his own advantage. He pulled me out of my very sheltered upper middle class upbringing and showed me that there was a bigger world. All the things I know about his life and he is still able to be the greatest person I know. He gave me confidence. He was there when everyone walked out. He taught me how to smile again. He taught me how important having someone in your life like that is. He was my rock for the majority of my life, without him I guarantee I wouldn't be here today (in more than one sense of that word, too). He can never be replaced even if he isn't in my life right now.

5. How/when/why/where/what did you start smoking? Did you like it at first?
Funny you should ask. I've always wanted to write a blog about it and I'm pretty sure I have one saved in drafts, I just never finished it.
I was a late bloomer. All my friends were smoking at 12, when it took me til I was 15/16. No one ever pressured me into it. I just decided one day and I made my friend give me some. She put five Marlboro Lights in a bubble yum package, I called her that night and she coached me through inhaling. I smoked all 5 of them in a row- that's when I was first introduced to nico-pois (nicotine poisoning). I stayed home from school the next day. And the rest is history.

In college I switched to Capris for awhile. That's what my Nanny smoked and I would steal them from her. Then she got hip to it and started buying them for me.

When I worked in Disney I switched to Camel Turkish Golds- because I needed something stronger than Marlboro's to deal with all the stupid people. When I got back, someone asked me if I had been in jail because he had never seen a girl smoke Camels.

One very large party night, I switched to Camel Turkish Jade 100s (which are menthol) and I had been smoking those ever since, til the bastards discontinued them.

Now, I smoke Camel No. 9 Menthols and I'm running out. Anyone want to mail me some? I refuse to pay $10 a pack.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I feel like the ugly step sister

My foot refuses to go back into my birthday boots. I think the pancake sized blisters for wearing them without breaking them in first has a large say in this.
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Birthday not so surprised.

My birthday celebration was ruined twice (like I didn't know it was happening today anyway- it is my birthDAY).

As soon as the invite went out (sans me) my cubemate asks "Why do you get a special celebration? I thought we did birthdays for the month?"

And then I heard someone over the cubes say "How are we going to have a birthday celebration with all these samples everywhere?"

Good job, guys! J/K. I totally appreciated it, my card was really cute and The Red Velvet was fabulous!
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What do you keep in your refrigerator?

My roommate just emailed me that she found my Birth Control in the frig- next to the beef bullion cubes.


In my defense, it is not used and it is unopened. It needs to be refrigerated because it is body heat activated and we do not need any little MEs running around anytime soon. Where else am I supposed to put it?

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Snuggie: My thoughts exactly.

Cookies for Breakfast

Just another way I'm going to stick it to the man. Tomorrow I might be turning 27, but I refuse to acknowledge I have to start acting like an adult.
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Monday, February 2, 2009

Happy Un-Birthday to ME!!

It is legally my birthday. I wasn't actually born on this day, it's just what my birth certificate says (It must have been a typo, a typo, a typo. . . ok. Sorry. That stupid anti-smoking commerical popped in my head just now. carry on.)

I even got a text from him this morning. He remembered. Maybe there is hope.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

One. Two. Three. Four.

I'm really glad I'm the only one in the apartment right now. As I crochet, it helps to count my stitches out loud. Counting them out loud in different accents? Even Better! You should try it, it's amusing me to no end. You could see why this might be a concern for others if they were here to witness this, right? 
I'm working on different languages, too. It doesn't really help as much though, because I only know up to 7 in French and 10 in Spanish.

On a side note, did The Count from Sesame Street scare the hell out of anyone else? I was terrified of him, but now that I'm older, it's fun scaring my nieces. I don't know if they're scared of him, but when my mini-me was little, she watched the Sesame Street sing-a-longs religiously- mainly Elmo, but I do recall having to listen to this song on many occasions. It's quite catchy, don't ya think? I've listened to it like 10 times. I shouldn't have admitted that, huh? I guess I shouldn't admit now I have moved on to searching all Sesame Street songs that I remember from childhood? Alright. Have. To. Crochet.