Technical Difficulties.

Steve Jobs
Apple Corporation
1 Infinite Loop
Cupertino, CA 95014
408.996.1010

Dear Mr. Jobs:

First of all, I would like to say I love your products. However, when the original iPod came out, I was against it. I did not believe there should be a product that would phase out the radio. Radio is free and your product was definitely not so free, so I believed your product to be the devil (just kidding!). Once the Video iPod came into existence, though, my life was forever changed. I was in love with the fact that I could upload movies onto it and watch them anywhere. Kudos to you Mr. Jobs! My video iPod is now permanently attached to the radio and the only station I keep it on is 87.9. But this letter is not to state how amazing your products are, because that fact is indisputable.

I recently received a blue ipod shuffle as a gift. BLUE! I am sorry but I am a firm friend of the first half of the rainbow and that is all- red, pink, orange and yellow. Blue is a tragic color and obviously this person did not know me very well at all, but I digress. I decided I needed to exchange this for a better color (of course we are talking about pink). Now, if you listen to nothing else in this letter, please understand this next sentence is the thesis sentence: I do not understand why it takes an Act of Congress to exchange an Apple product without a receipt. Exchange, by definition, to give up (a blue shuffle) for something else (a pink shuffle); part with for some equivalent; change for another. Granted, a pink shuffle is by no means in the same category as a blue shuffle, only because the color is better in my opinion, but in yours they are considered equal, hence charging the same price for it. Therefore, I do not understand WHY I am having such a difficult time doing a simple task people normally do on a daily basis. I called your customer service department and I was told that as long as the product is brand new in the packaging I could swap the two products (an even exchange) with no problem at any Apple authorized dealer. Well, she lied. I cannot do that. I need a receipt and seeing as I will not be ever getting a receipt (for reasons that would take a novel to explain and I don’t want to take up too much of your time), I need to know how I can do this. It seems you are the “God” of all knowing and I would feel blessed if you would bestow on me a tiny inkling on how to do this.

Now I am not normally an irate customer. I understand that those servicing me did not make the rules and are simply doing their jobs, and being that you are the CEO of this company I am assuming that you do- make the rules that is. And seeing as my request is a tiny one (it is not like I’m asking for the secrets of how to MAKE an ipod shuffle) and I asking you to please inform me the proper way to go about exchanging a blue ipod shuffle for a pink one without a receipt and without knowing where this product was purchased. It’s simple, really and then you will have another happy Apple customer to support and buy any other product your ingenious mind comes up with.

In sum, I would appreciate a response containing in detail how to go about exchanging my brand new in the package BLUE ipod shuffle with a PINK shuffle without a receipt and without knowing where it was purchased. Thank you, Mr. Jobs, for your time.

With kindest regards, I remain
Sincerely,

The Nicotine Queen